This issue is incredibly complex.
- There’s not a vocabulary to capture some of the things happening which is debilitating - you can’t fully process what’s happening cognitively or emotionally
- The “influencers” take on multiple forms
- Parents OR 1 parent
- Glitter family
- Peer
- Adult
- School
- Government
- DFPS
- Lawyer
- Judge
- MHP
It could literally be anyone!
Parents encouraging small children to enter the trans cult are alienating children from society and causing them to be estranged from who they are biologically. Small children have no foundation to generate rapid onset gender dysphoria other than developmental stages that have inherent gender role confusion.
It’s important to vet the people that will be around your children and screen the shows they watch. We are in an era that external influences are not filtered…the woke ideologies are everywhere.
Therapists and Trans
- Some therapists don't realize the severity and depth of the problem. In fact, they may unwittingly affirm with the gender confusion and even testify in court that the child is experiencing gender confusion (with a diagnosis referencing gender dysphoria)
- Our courts, social services and mental health workers are all committed to stop child abuse and neglect when they see it occurring. Unfortunately, with gender confusion a dramatic and loud complaint often ends up being acted upon without appropriate treatment and assessments for the underlying issues and exploring all options to rule out other possibilities for a potential mental health diagnosis. This frequently removes the parents from the children and allows the glitter family/peers considerable amounts of additional time to proceed with the alienating behaviors
- By the time all of the evaluations are in place and the case is heard by the court, considerable damage has been done to the child
CHARACTERISTICS OF THE GLITTER FAMILY
- Tend to focus on their own needs
- Inability to view situations from another’s perspective
- Pattern of blaming and denial of any contribution to the problem
- Extremely sensitive to criticism
- Often unable to trust others
- Thrive on conflict/hostility and then avoidance
- Chronic inability to communicate about truth and reality
- Rigid thinking
- Distorts/misinterprets information
- Loss of control/competence is unbearable
- Focus on negative stories of biological family
- Are not held accountable for their destructive behaviors
- Behaviors endorsed by social media and other external factors
- Inferences that the biological family is not safe, supportive, or loving
- Emotionally fragile
- Emotionally impaired (borderline personally disorder)
- Sensitive to narcissistic injuries
- Need for control and power
- Over focused on right and wrong; win and lose
- Rigid black and white type beliefs
- Revengeful, bitter
- Enmeshed with the child
- Potentially dependent on the child for self-esteem
- Role reversal
- Indulges and empowers child
- Lack insight into their own behaviors and the impact on others
- Often show personality traits and coping mechanisms of defensiveness, denial of wrongdoing, excessive virtuousness and projection of blame
- View themselves as all good and vilify the parent
- Information that is contrary to their belief system is discarded
- May be rigidly defended, moralistic, perceive themselves as flawless, externalize responsibility onto others
- May reward, not admonish children for inappropriate behaviors
FACTORS THAT INFLUENCE THE CHILD’S ADJUSTMENT
Garrity & Baris (1994)
- AGE OF CHILD
- GENDER OF THE CHILD
- TEMPERAMENT OF THE CHILD
- ENVIRONMENTAL STABILITY
- PARENTAL STABILITY
- PARENTAL ACCESS
- PARENTAL RELATIONSHIP
IMPACT OF HIGH-CONFLICT ON CHILDREN
- Caught in the middle of the cultural animosity
- Places a burden on the child’s development and identity formation
- Impairs reality testing
- Interferes with responsible parenting
- Alters the nature of parent-child relationships
- Threatens the protective nature of parents
- Frightens children
- Increases anxiety and distress
- May assume an adult role
- “Surreal sense of not existing” (Johnston and Roseby)
GLITTER FAMILY’S EMOTIONAL MAKEUP
- Severe cases have clinical pathology
- May be psychotic, sociopathic or severely character-disordered
- Often involving either malicious or strongly believed allegations of abuse that have not been substantiated after repeated investigations
- They may be paranoid or show evidence of Munchausen’s by Proxy
GLITTER FAMILY EXCLUSIONARY BEHAVIORS
- Belief that glitter family is all “good” and the biological family is all “bad”
- Teaches that their parents are totally unacceptable
- Magnifies parental flaws
- Repeats negative comments
- Claims “suicidal ideation”
- Uses illness to block access
- Interrupts or blocks the child’s time with the biological parents
- Sabotages the child’s family dynamic
- Uses negative names to describe their parents
- Uses “us” language to exclude the biological family
- Openly blames the child’s parents
- Destroys physical reminders of the child’s parent
- Makes loaded comments while claiming to encourage the child
- Assumes a role that the glitter family is the only family able to love the child
- Employs guilt, manipulation and fear to force the child to choose them over the parent
- Withholds mail, gifts and calls from the child
- Implies the parent is dangerous
- Uses religious and racial differences to discourage the relationship with the parent
- Makes false claims of neglect or abuse
- May encourage the child to use a different name
CHILD WITH ALLEGED GENDER CONFUSION
They become highly attuned to the glitter family’s neediness and dependency on them for love and acceptance. The child learns that it is impossible to show love for their biological parents; showing love for and receiving love from the biological parent is tantamount to betraying the glitter family.
CHARACTERISTICS OF THE CHILD WITH ALLEGED GENDER CONFUSION
- Vulnerable
- Dependent and likely enmeshed
- Anxious/fearful
- Poor reality testing
- To cope with shifting loyalty they will align with glitter family
- History of separation anxiety/insecure attachments
- Passive
- Highly sensitive
- Express feelings of guilt
- Center of transgender warfare
- Identify with or play the rescuer of the glitter family
- Assume care-taking roles of others experiencing gender confusion
- Feel conditionally loved
- Impaired coping skills
- Abused child (psychological mistreatment)
FACTORS WITHIN CHILDREN THAT CONTRIBUTES TO STRONG ALIGNMENTS WITH THE GLITTER FAMILY
- Need to protect the glitter family/caregiver/peer who has decompensated, is depressed, panicky or needy
- Need to avoid the wrath of rejection of a powerful, dominant glitter family/caregiver/peer
- Need to hold onto the glitter family/caregiver/peer the child was most afraid of losing
- Glitter family/caregiver/peer is self-absorbed
- Casually involved with child
CONTRIBUTIONS OF CHILDREN
- Young teens wanting greater freedom may amplify their complaints about a stricter parent to the more affirming community capitalizing on the affirming community’s eagerness for validation of fixed negative view of the biological family
- Other minors that are members of the trans community
- Child’s age, cognitive capacity, temperament and vulnerability
- Children under age 7 less likely to experience gender confusion because they are less able to “hold onto” the gender confusion when not with the individual indoctrinating the confused gender identity
- Typically starts in pre-adolescent or adolescent years (9 to 13 years old) due to cognitive maturation
CHILD EXCLUSIONARY BEHAVIORS
- Preoccupation with overwhelming sense of “hatred” and may denigrate the parent
- View’s biological parent as all bad and glitter family as all good
- Maintains a clear distinction between affirmation and non-affirmation
- Profess the belief that they are trans and that is the only truth
- Uses rehearsed phrases when making allegations
- Provides illogical and exaggerated reasons for confusion
- Unquestionably accepts allegations from the glitter family about the biological family
- Disregards the feelings of the biological parent
- Refuses or resists biological family
- Uses “us” language when talking about the glitter family or trans community
- Lacks appreciation for gifts or other signs of affection from the biological parent
- Frequently claims the biological parent breaks promises, and views this as hostile
- Distorts past or demonstrates selective amnesia regarding the relationship
- Ignores or rejects biological parent when in the company of the glitter family
- When alone with the biological parent they experience emotions ranging from animosity to mild affection
- Professes hatred for anyone that does not affirm gender
PROFESSIONALS:
When a child seeks out a professional to “bash” or “tattle-tell” on a parent
- Ask the child:
- Does your parent love you?
- Would your parent ever purposely harm you?
- Have you shared your frustration with your parent?
- Do you think your parent would fix the problem if they knew you were hurting?
- Is it fair to stay mad at your parent without giving them a fair opportunity to fix the problem?
- Help children understand what “gossip” is and how it exacerbates issues
- Help children understand that the lies create more distrust and questions
- Teach children how to express their feelings
- Teach children to develop a positive internal dialogue
- Encourage children to STP-R [Stop ~ Think ~ Pause ~ Redirect]
- When the child feels obligated to bash their parent in order to satisfy the glitter family they begin to
- sacrifice their own emotions
- have difficulty making decisions
- become people pleasers
- Prevent glitter family from using procedures as a means of controlling and undermining the biological parent
- Restrain glitter family’s communication with children